The breakdown of relationships has been researched for decades, and yet as a society we tend to consciously put aside our feelings and our partners’ feelings when the union starts to crumble. The time is now! Waiting has never changed a person or a circumstance. Alongside your partner you both can make the choice to find the path to true happiness and rebuild your relationship.

When it comes to our most intimate relationship, the person we promise to love and cherish for all of eternity in front of hundreds of people as we exchange wedding vows, one day becomes the person we can’t communicate with.
What happened? Often we compromise early on in the relationship in the hope that our partner/spouse will change or suddenly have the same values or interests that we hold true. Compromise is one of the very reasons half of the population is separating and or getting divorced.

When you meet that one person who you truly believe will be your everything, everyday and forever, the initial meeting is always guarded with niceties and not your inner most important needs and wants in your quality world. What is most important to you in the beginning, may not always be what is important to the new person. The discussion of hopes, dreams and ambitions gets clouded with the excitement of “this is it, I have found the one person that will be my life long partner.” When a person shows you who they are, believe them.

We tend to not remember that “list” of what we want in a relationship and what our deal breakers are. I use the word compromise often, as it is the reason why we become unhappy in a relationship. Couples feel that they are continually “giving in” or they are “not heard”, yet they complain that the relationship is not what they want.

Couples counselling can assist in guiding a couple to that “beginning” they often long for. All is not lost. Couples, with the help of a counsellor, can find the commonalities and communication that they both feel they have lost. Often couples haven’t spoken in years and the relationship is so “broken” they feel despair and loneliness in the relationship. When two people love each other and feel that they want to stay together for the right reasons, because they truly love each other, want the union to last and feel that there is hope for reconciliation, they attend couples counselling, hand in hand.

Friendship is the first step to reconciliation, which leads you both into the bedroom and the love you have missed. Couples learn to “like” each other again and reconnect in ways they never thought imaginable. If you are not communicating and not having sex with your partner for years, that is the red flag you need to prompt you to take the first step and admit you both need help to ignite the spark that has been lost for so many years. All is not lost – it was just ignored for a period of time. Take the time to repair your relationship, no matter the outcome. You both are worthy of a respectful, authentic, loving and kind partnership.